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Kiss the Rules Goodbye: A Guide to Making the First Move Like a Boss

Kiss the Rules Goodbye: A Guide to Making the First Move Like a Boss

Written by Suni Crane

Relationships are a two-way street. We agree it’s nice to have a man take charge and show his emotions, but that doesn’t mean you have to wait around for him to make a move.

Knowing what you want and having the confidence to go after it might be the sexiest thing you can do.

An easy way to step into your newfound confidence is with a little bit of practice. Talk to yourself in the mirror, or thoroughly think through the string of words you’re going to say. As they always say, practice makes perfect; this can be a game-changer for the overthinkers.

Making the first move in the beginning looks quite different than once you’ve been seeing each other for a while. We’re on board for making the first move no matter what stage of the relationship you’re in, so let’s run through a few different stages and the advice that goes with them.

Asking them out.

Whether someone you’ve recently met or someone you’ve known for years, this applies to you!

It can be super helpful to plan your interaction out a bit. A mental rough draft can be a helpful tool for those who want to get their words juuuust right. Put yourself in their shoes. How would you want them to ask you out? Think of ways to position yourself as enticing and intriguing. Don’t be afraid to stick to a classic one-liner; they’re classics for a reason, right?!

All in all, just keep up the confidence!

Playing it Cool.

If we know anything, it’s that feelings can develop fast….and we mean lighting fast. Once you’ve gone on a few dates, it can be tempting to play it overly cool, but we think it’s best to strike a balance.

Think of yourself as the cool, calm, & collected one. We know it’s easier said than done, but try to dive in and say what you’re thinking without expecting anything in return. You can be proud of yourself for expressing your feelings without receiving instant validation from them! Playing it cool doesn’t mean being icy and closed off; it just means not showing all of your cards in the beginning…just enough to intrigue them!

Putting it all on the table.

Being confident enough to express your feelings before knowing exactly what the other person is thinking can be pretty terrifying…but also pretty freaking amazing!

Think about it this way: if things are going well and you are developing deep feelings, it’s likely happening to the other person as well. If they’re the right person for you, then expressing yourself shouldn’t scare them off; it should excite them.

Whether walking up to an attractive stranger on the street or finally working up the courage to ask out that hot bartender, we believe in you!

Go make the first move and tell us alllll about it! DM us with your stories @togeth3r on Instagram.